It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
