i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
