I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
