I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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