is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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