I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got inside last night via doggy door
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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