Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
