i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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