You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
