We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize