why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
There are leaves in my underwear?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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