So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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