i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize