i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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