this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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