Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Don't make out with my wife yet
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
