I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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