The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize