idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
she pinky promised me she was 18
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Vodka?
Forever.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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