Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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