Can Purell be used as lube?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Is Oprah even human
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
My life is pants optional.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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