We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
