and my herpes radar will keep us safe
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
