The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
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What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
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I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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