dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
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he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
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I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
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