A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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