You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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