I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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