i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Randomize
