sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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