Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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