I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
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His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
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i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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