i may or may not be watching the land before time
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
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