How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize