It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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