oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Randomize
