he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE