do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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