So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
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