let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
