who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
