He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
