What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
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