He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Randomize
