i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
