I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Randomize
