He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
