So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
