Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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