I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I wish i was in the wii world.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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