i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
