chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize