I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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